Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Terror Day

It's 9/11 and that means it's Terror Day- America's newest holiday!

It being new, people are still looking for ways to celebrate. Some people are doing good deeds, others are having memorial services... Still, we seem to lack uniform ways to celebrate Terror Day. In keeping with some of the trends that have evolved, I have some suggestions...

1. On Terror Eve (9/10), hide your civil rights. See how many you can still find on Terror Day.

2. Print up copies of your internet access records. Give copies to the CIA spooks that go door to door in your neighborhood.

3. Put up cameras and microphones throughout your home and office.

4. Find the biggest turkey you can. Make him President.

5. Stay up late all night on Terror Eve. At midnight, on the first second of Terror Day go outside and listen for your neighbors. Record anything you hear. Report your findings to the authorities.

6. Watch Gen. David Petraeus. If he sees Congress, there'll be six more months of war.